Self medicating sucks but it’s not like you can get it from a doctor anymore

I 100% agree that the DEA made all of us responsible chronic pain victims suffer more. Now they have this MME (morphine mg equivalent) system that ansolutely screwed everyone who has been on opioids long term.

I also suffer from back pain (several multilevel nerve  impingements from herniations),3 collapsed disks, DDD on multiple levels) sciatica (which I can't stand at all. I'd rather sit on a bowling pin the long way than deal with that lightning storm) (if you have sevear sciatica, you absolutely know it. I have a spinal cord stimulator which has worked lovely with the nerve meds and pain meds, and also pain in multiple joints after my wild lifestyle in my 20s and having to have at LEAST 15 general anesthesia surgeries, so far...

I know that it's absolutely frustrating to be looked at, and judged the way most doctors are doing now, however... If you go to a pain management doctor, and it's a pretty straight forward, and obvious that pain is ruining your quality of life, 100% make sure your doctors know about it.
They know if youre lying and can tell if you're truly in chronic pain in 5 mins. Your blood pressure raises, constantly have a concerned look on your 00face, and you constantly have to readjust the position you're sitting in to be "comfortable.." These are the obvious tell tale signs that you're actially in pain.

I was sent to a pain management doctor, and basically because #1 I've already tried , A,B,and C "treatments", and #2 I have positive, well documented test results that prove the pain is real, the pain doctor wrote a letter to my PCP explaining the situation, confirming that my ailments are painful and not all just between the ears; she suggested a few opioid options for me to try.

It took some time to find what worked for me, but now after breaking just about every bone, getting fed up with not being physically able to do the simplest if tasks, I finally "gave up" on toughing it out and now I'm a well established chronic pain patient... At 34 years old

I've already approved for disability but after being told the m a measly amount each month ($2500... A MONTH...)I decided against it (except part A, B and D) because why should I have to financially suffer too, and lessen the lifestyle that I choose to live...

I can say that being without this medication, really messed my life up badly. Socially, physically at work, effected my relationship because I was always so grunpy and miserable to be around... So for others as well as for myself, I finally signed the pain contract and thankfully im now able to manage the pain to a dull roar and continue living a life worth living...
But moral of the story. The squeaky wheel gets the oil. You don't have to suffer and feel like you're doing something wrong because what you're doing is simply advocating for yourself. No one else knows your pain and your body better than YOU. Just because 1 doctor doesn't want to wrote the Rx, but if there's a textbook, black and white reason for the constant pain, these doctors should 100% do what they were trained to do... prescribe and manage medications.

I'm sorry to read everyone's horror stories, and also that you had to read mine (lol) just know that you're not alone and the struggle is real. Advocate for yourself times 8636918261!! Dr's won't know how bad it is, unless you tell them. My Dr looked at me when I asked, and honestly said to me, "What took you so long..." read that last part again. I promise you don't have to completely suffer.